The Next Indicated Step

It's been a while and recently I was encouraged to write if I want to write and not to be concerned with what I write; is it pretty or poetic or scholarly?  Just put out the truth and let it go. 

I am reading a book suggested by a friend. Carry On, Warrior by Glennon Doyle Melton. She writes her truth and her writing triggered some thoughts in my head and one of those thoughts is what I'll share on today.

Some days are much more difficult than others. Getting out of bed seems impossible. On those days a simple phrase - an action phrase I learned in 12 step meetings - gets me through that first minute... Take The Next Indicated Step. I ask my Higher Power for the strength to take that step. And on the impossible days that next indicated step is: throw back the covers. Mind you, those covers weigh a ton, as if someone wove my comforter from gold while I was sleeping.  If I manage to get the covers thrown back, the next step is: sit up. And following that is: swing to the right and put my feet on the floor. Each step is a little easier than the last one, and I find myself walking across the room, turning on the shower, bathing, drying off, making coffee, making something to eat, etc.

Until I find it hard to believe that only an hour earlier I thought I'd never get out of bed.

This approach works well during the day too when I am suddenly overwhelmed with the number of tasks ahead of me and the limited number of hours left in the day.  I become paralyzed for a moment. I don't know what to do first, or next.  Once again I ask my Higher Power for strength. I stop. I breathe. Then I touch one thing. And I complete that task. And things get moving again.

"Take The Next Indicated Step" was not always my first thought. And it still isn't always the first place I go when I am feeling lost. In my early recovery I procrastinated, I wallowed, I complained and I didn't take any action.  Every day from then to now I've gathered tools and changed small behaviors. Little by little I've learned, first by force and eventually on the occasional autopilot, to take the action, seek that next indicated step.

More will be revealed. Stick around.